Friday, September 5, 2008

Dear Ask Y and X

Dear Ask Y and X,

Coincidentally I read your blog today and you are talking about what I like to refer to as dead beat dads; I know because I have one.

I am a single mom of 2 children, boy 6 and girl 8. My husband and I divorced last year and it hasn't been pretty since then. He takes the kids two weekends a month and that's all. For the first 3 or 4 months he did give me money for the kids and then it just stopped. I am always asking him for help financially and with the kids after school activities. He always thinks it's my responsibility to leave my job when the kids are sick at school, pick them up from sport activities and provide for them financially. It has gotten so bad that my bills are behind because I have to make sure all my kids things are paid for and they do need to eat. He acts as if I had them by myself. But what has really got me heated is recently my kids came home and complained they didn't want to go back to their dad's again because his new girlfriend doesn't like them. She always telling them to stay in their room and don't make any noise. When I confronted him about it he had nothing to say. I told him I wouldn't let the kids come over if they are being mistreated. He says I'm over reacting no one is being mistreated. He just doesn't understand just because she's not hitting them verbal is still mistreatment. My kids says she says things to them in a mean tone. I'm not saying my kids are angels but they aren't bad either. They are friendly children and I have taught them to respect everyone. My friends that have kept my kids has never had issues and their teachers always compliments how good they are. That leads me to believe it's her that's got the problem. I will not tolerate my kids being mistreated or feeling uncomfortable, I can just keep them at home. And no they don't have an issue with my husband and I separating. It's not like he was the best father when he lived with us either, but at least he helped out more. I don't know what to do at this point. I am so overwhelmed with everything, I can't think straight. I would like your feedback and what you think.

Yours Truly,

Fed Up!


P.S Love the posts, keep them coming. I have told all my friends about it.

Why must we have drama....pt II (men)

Seems as though "Why must we have drama" stirred up a lot of emotions and there are many requests to discuss the male side. No problem here, so let's discuss.


Why is it after the relationship ends it becomes the mother that is now the acting role of mother AND father? So many single woman are left with the pressures of maintaining the households, bills, and raising the child(ren) alone. To make matters worse there are a high number of males that do not make good efforts to help out financially or spend time with the child(ren). The women are left chasing them to get them to do right by the child(ren) or result to putting them on child support. Why should a parent need to be chased down to take care of their responsibilties? Or why should one have to do it alone? Children don't asked to be here so there should be no reason they have to suffer the consequences made by the parties that created them.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

He cheated....now what?

There is clear evidence that your husband/boyfriend has disrespected your relationship. You have had an uneasy feeling that something isn't right between the two of you lately; which drives you to start snooping around. Now you have found yourself checking voicemails, text messages and e-mail. Ah-ha! You have stumbled onto what you have been looking for, but now that you see it is that what you wanted to find. E-mails of conversations with other women, that are obviously more than just platonic friends. Even meeting dates they have had. What do you do? Will you approach him about this; but wait you snooped so are you in the wrong to say something. Or will you just ignore it as if it never happened because you want to keep your man? You know he cheated.....but now what?